Every time my spouse is drunk or loses at gambling, they become violent. What should I do?

Your and your children's safety must come first, immediately; you are not obliged to endure violence in the name of patience. If you are in danger now, call the police on 999 immediately, and Talian Kasih 15999 for protection and advice. Plan a safe place to go with the children if things come to a head, and keep important documents close by. Addiction does need treatment, but that treatment is not a responsibility you fulfil by gambling with your own safety. Get support from family, a counsellor, or the authorities. Protecting yourself is not a sign you have failed as a spouse. See domestic violence help.