We want to hold a kenduri (family feast) involving both households. How do we avoid tension?

Arrange the kenduri as one big family, not two separate groups, so the children do not split into two camps. Discuss early with your husband and, if possible, with your co-wife about tasks, seating and welcoming guests. Give the children from both homes shared roles, such as greeting guests or decorating, so they get to know each other naturally. Allah reminds us: “The believers are but brothers” (Surah al-Hujurat 49:10), and children of the same father truly are siblings. Avoid sensitive conversations about division or the past on that day. Intend the gathering for Allah's sake and to strengthen ties, not to show off. See relationships between co-wives.