🤝 Existing wife & prospective wife · #116

I don't want to hate my husband, but I am deeply hurt. How do I manage these two feelings?

You can be hurt by someone and still love them; these two feelings exist at the same time and need not be forced into one. Forcing yourself to keep loving as if nothing had happened only blocks healing. Allow yourself to feel the hurt without turning it into lasting hatred. Tell your husband you are hurt, starting with ‘I feel’, so he understands without you attacking him. Give your heart time to recover; wounded love can heal if it is cared for with honesty and compassion from both sides. Pray for yourself and for him. If hatred begins to take over and does not ease, a counsellor can help you let it go. See counselling.

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This answer is general reference, not a fatwa. For your situation, consult the religious affairs office, a Syarie lawyer or your state Syariah Court.

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