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🤍 Character & conduct between spouses · #348

When there is a problem at home, I tend to blame my wife and children. How do I fix this?

A true leader asks ‘what is my part in this?’ before pointing a finger at others. Blaming offloads the burden for a moment but solves nothing, and it makes the family afraid to admit mistakes to you. As the head, you are the first who will be asked about the state of the home, so the main responsibility comes back to you. When a problem arises, start by admitting your part, then invite the family to solve it together without hunting for who is to blame. Focus on solutions, not punishment. A home whose head takes responsibility becomes a safe place for everyone to own up and improve. See communication & emotions.
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This answer is general reference, not a fatwa. For your situation, consult the religious affairs office, a Syarie lawyer or your state Syariah Court.

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