MYPolygyny.com
Knowledge for the Muslim household
Flashcards Lineage

Q&A › Khitbah & engagement

💍 Khitbah & engagement · #94

For months the woman's family has not answered our proposal. Should we ask?

Yes; asking politely is your right, and it helps both sides out of a state of limbo. Let a family representative contact them, not the man directly contacting the young woman. Use words that do not pressure, for example: ‘We are just asking after our earlier intention. If the family needs more time, we understand.’ If the answer is still vague, you may set a time limit kindly. Prolonged silence is sometimes how some families refuse without saying so directly. Accept whatever the answer is with an open heart, and get on with life without bearing a grudge. See when a proposal is declined.
← PreviousI am ready to propose but too shy to tell my own parents. How do I start?Next →The man's family keeps postponing the wedding date. How should we act?

Related questions

The woman has been proposed to but has not yet answered. May I propose to her too?In the Shafi'i school, yes, as long as the first proposal has not been clearly accepted. The prohibition on proposing over another'…My fiancé lost his job a few months before our wedding date. Should we postpone?Not necessarily; what needs weighing is his ability to provide basic maintenance (nafkah) after the akad, not the size…A proposal party is coming to our home. What do we need to prepare as hosts?Prepare a calm atmosphere, a family spokesperson who is ready, and an answer your daughter has agreed to. Simple refreshments…We are the bride's family. How do we set a fair hantaran without burdening the man's side?Start with the cost of the celebration you are actually planning, then adjust it to what the man’s side can afford. List t…The family making the enquiry asked personal questions such as salary and health history. Must we answer everything?Not everything; answer what is reasonable for a decision to marry, and keep very personal matters for a more ser…After an enquiry or a proposal, how long is it reasonable for us to take before giving an answer?The Shariah sets no particular period; what matters is that the time is enough to consider without leaving…
This answer is general reference, not a fatwa. For your situation, consult the religious affairs office, a Syarie lawyer or your state Syariah Court.

Comments or feedback

Read only by the MYPolygyny administrator — never published.

🔒 Do not include sensitive personal details. Privacy notice

About Us · Ask · Site Map · Privacy · Editorial policy · Disclaimer