🧭 Preparation & choosing a spouse · #81
Our families' economic backgrounds are very different. How do we keep it from becoming a problem?
A difference in economic standing between two families can be managed when both sides are humble and mindful of each other's feelings. The problem is usually not the money itself, but feelings of inferiority, pride, or different ideas about spending. Discuss expectations about the wedding gift (hantaran), the reception and lifestyle frankly so that no side is burdened or offended. Do not let the families measure a person's worth by their wealth. Focus on your future spouse's religion and character, because that is the real measure. With moderation and respect, this gap need not become a wall. See kafa'ah.