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🤍 Character & conduct between spouses · #282

I am the blunt type, but my spouse says I am hurtful. How can I be honest without wounding?

Truth and gentleness are not opposites; Islam requires both at once. Allah says: “(always) say a word directed to the Right” (Surah al-Ahzab 33:70), and truth is most effective when it is delivered well. Being blunt is not a licence to be harsh; it is a responsibility that must be wrapped in wisdom. Before speaking, ask yourself: is this true, is it necessary, and am I saying it in the best way? Choose the right moment and a gentle tone, and mention the good before the correction. Truth delivered with love is accepted more easily than truth that is hurled. See ways to win hearts.

Sources

Surah al-Ahzab 33:70
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This answer is general reference, not a fatwa. For your situation, consult the religious affairs office, a Syarie lawyer or your state Syariah Court.

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