🧒 Raising children (tarbiyah) · #175

The other home is better off and my child keeps comparing his things. How do I teach qana'ah (contentment)?

Teach your child to appreciate the blessings he has by focusing on a sense of having enough, not on what others own. Avoid responding by complaining about your own shortages, because children copy their parents' attitudes. Show an example of gratitude through daily actions, such as naming small blessings and giving charity together. Allah reminds us: “And do not covet that in which Allah has favoured some of you over others” (Surah an-Nisa' 4:32). Help your child be proud of things money cannot buy, such as character, knowledge and family love. If he remains troubled, talk with him about the real source of that feeling. See children in polygyny.

Sources

Surah an-Nisa' 4:32

← PreviousMy child is disappointed that his father could not come to his sports day because of an event for the child in the other home. What should I do?Next →My child refuses to come along for Raya visiting at the other home. Should I force him?

Related questions

I realise I spoil the children in one home more than the other. How do I stop?Admitting that tendency is the first step; next, correct it deliberately and consistently. The Prophet ﷺ said: “B…My child says her father loves the other family more. How do I comfort her?Assure your child that a father’s love does not lessen even when it is shared, while acknowledging her feelings as va…The grandparents spoil the grandchildren from the other home more. How do I protect my child's heart?Protect your child’s heart by strengthening his sense of self at home first, then raising it tactfully with the gran…The children are confused because the rules at my home and at their mother's home are very different. What should I do?Accept that two homes will not be the same, and focus on keeping your own home’s rules consistently. Children can l…My children and my co-wife's children are always jealous and fighting when they meet. What should I do?The friction often comes from competing for their father’s attention, not because they truly hate one a…The children in my home look down on their siblings in the other home because their circumstances differ. What should I do?That attitude of looking down must be corrected promptly because it contradicts family values and humility. C…

This answer is general reference, not a fatwa. For your situation, consult the religious affairs office, a Syarie lawyer or your state Syariah Court.

Comments or feedback

Read only by the MYPolygyny administrator — never published.

About Us · Ask · Site Map · Privacy · Editorial policy · Disclaimer