🧒 Raising children (tarbiyah) · #116

My teenager sometimes answers back rudely and raises his voice. How do I stay calm?

Calm yourself first, because answering rudeness with anger only feeds the same fire. This does not mean you allow rudeness; it means you do not act while your blood is up. Take a breath, lower your voice, and if necessary step away for a while, saying you will continue the conversation once both of you are calm. Allah praises the God-conscious as those “who restrain their anger and pardon people” (Surah Ali 'Imran 3:134). Once things settle, set a clear boundary without stripping his dignity: say which behaviour is not acceptable and why. The calm example you show teaches more than any telling-off. See educating the family.

Sources

Surah Ali 'Imran 3:134

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This answer is general reference, not a fatwa. For your situation, consult the religious affairs office, a Syarie lawyer or your state Syariah Court.

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