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💍 Khitbah & engagement · #54

My fiancé(e) keeps asking for money or expensive gifts before the wedding. Should I be worried?

Yes, it can be a warning sign; repeated requests for money before marriage, especially with various emergency stories, need careful assessment.
An engagement does not yet create any duty of maintenance; gifts are gifts, not rights that can be demanded. Allah forbids consuming others' wealth unjustly (an-Nisa' 4:29) and tells us to verify news before acting (al-Hujurat 49:6). Warning signs: unwillingness to meet the family, emergency stories that keep changing, pressure to keep the gifts secret, or a relationship that began online with someone you have never met. Romance scams often begin this way. Talk to your family, ask for a meeting with the guardian present, and do not transfer money you cannot afford to lose. If you suspect fraud, report it to the police. See Romance scams.

Sources

Surah an-Nisa' 4:29Surah al-Hujurat 49:6Surah al-Baqarah 2:188
← PreviousWe are engaged but live far apart or in different countries. How do we keep the relationship going, and what are the limits?Next →I am engaged to a divorcee or widow(er) who has children. What should be prepared before the marriage?

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This answer is general reference, not a fatwa. For your situation, consult the religious affairs office, a Syarie lawyer or your state Syariah Court.

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