🤍 Character & conduct between spouses · #27
Should the first day of Hari Raya be spent with the husband's family or the wife's? What is the right approach?
No Shariah ruling requires one family to come first; what is asked is to consult each other, be fair and keep good ties with both families.
Allah commands kindness to parents and relatives (an-Nisa' 4:36) and that affairs be decided by consultation (ash-Shura 42:38). Many Malaysian couples take turns: this year the first day in the husband's home town, next year in the wife's, or splitting the first and second days. Consider the real circumstances, for example parents who are frail, living alone or the travelling distance. What should be avoided is turning it into a contest, sulking or forcing one's spouse without discussion. Decide early, well before Ramadan ends, and tell both families together. For polygamous families, see also the question on the Hari Raya rota. See In-laws.
Allah commands kindness to parents and relatives (an-Nisa' 4:36) and that affairs be decided by consultation (ash-Shura 42:38). Many Malaysian couples take turns: this year the first day in the husband's home town, next year in the wife's, or splitting the first and second days. Consider the real circumstances, for example parents who are frail, living alone or the travelling distance. What should be avoided is turning it into a contest, sulking or forcing one's spouse without discussion. Decide early, well before Ramadan ends, and tell both families together. For polygamous families, see also the question on the Hari Raya rota. See In-laws.
Sources
Surah an-Nisa' 4:36Surah asy-Syura 42:38Surah an-Nahl 16:90