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🧒 Raising children (tarbiyah) · #188

My eldest child was angry to learn there is a new baby in the other home. What should I do?

That reaction is normal; the child feels his place in his father's heart is somehow threatened by the arrival of the new baby. Do not snap at him or label him jealous, because that only adds to his sense of being left out. Instead, assure him that your love has not lessened and that his place in the family remains secure. Discuss his feelings openly: ask what he is worried about and listen without interrupting. When the time is right, take him to meet his new sibling so that the baby becomes someone he knows, not an imagined rival. Give him a role as a respected big brother or big sister. Read more in children & polygyny.
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Related questions

I realise I spoil the children in one home more than the other. How do I stop?Admitting that tendency is the first step; next, correct it deliberately and consistently. The Prophet ﷺ said: “B…My children and my co-wife's children are always jealous and fighting when they meet. What should I do?The friction often comes from competing for their father’s attention, not because they truly hate one a…The children in my home look down on their siblings in the other home because their circumstances differ. What should I do?That attitude of looking down must be corrected promptly because it contradicts family values and humility. C…The children are confused because the rules at my home and at their mother's home are very different. What should I do?Accept that two homes will not be the same, and focus on keeping your own home’s rules consistently. Children can l…I worry that my children feel they lack everything because they only have me. How do I put their hearts and mine at ease?What children remember most is not what they did not have, but feeling loved and safe with you. Avoid frequently apologising…My teenager only does what I say when I get angry. How do I get him to listen without force?Rules only stick when the relationship behind them is warm, because without love instructions turn into battle…
This answer is general reference, not a fatwa. For your situation, consult the religious affairs office, a Syarie lawyer or your state Syariah Court.

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