🤍 Character & conduct between spouses · #53
What should I do when my spouse is angry with me?
Do not answer fire with fire; calm the situation first, then talk once the anger has passed.
Allah says: repel evil with what is better, and the one between whom and you there was enmity will become like a devoted friend (Fussilat 41:34). The Prophet ﷺ taught the angry person to sit down if standing, and to lie down if still angry (Sunan Abu Dawud 4782) — we can help our spouse do this by lowering our voice, not standing over them and giving space. Avoid phrases like "you are always like this". Acknowledge the feeling: "I can see you are very disappointed". If you were at fault, admit it at once. But if the anger leads to threats or blows, your safety and the children's comes first — leave and get help. See Persuasion techniques.
Allah says: repel evil with what is better, and the one between whom and you there was enmity will become like a devoted friend (Fussilat 41:34). The Prophet ﷺ taught the angry person to sit down if standing, and to lie down if still angry (Sunan Abu Dawud 4782) — we can help our spouse do this by lowering our voice, not standing over them and giving space. Avoid phrases like "you are always like this". Acknowledge the feeling: "I can see you are very disappointed". If you were at fault, admit it at once. But if the anger leads to threats or blows, your safety and the children's comes first — leave and get help. See Persuasion techniques.
Sources
Surah Fussilat 41:34Sunan Abu Dawud 4782 (sahih)Surah Ali 'Imran 3:134