🤝 Existing wife & prospective wife · #54

Since my husband took another wife, I have lost my desire to be intimate with him. Is that a sin?

The feeling is common after an emotional wound and is not a sin; what is needed is honesty, time to heal and seeking help — not silent refusal as punishment.
Allah does not burden a soul beyond its capacity (al-Baqarah 2:286). The hadith about a wife refusing her husband refers to refusal without excuse; deep emotional pain can be a temporary excuse that a husband must understand. A husband with more than one wife must also live with each in kindness (an-Nisa' 4:19) and rebuild trust, not merely demand his rights. Steps: express your feelings honestly; ask him to spend time with you without talking about the co-wife; seek individual or couples counselling; and watch for signs of depression. If it continues for a long time, discuss the future of the marriage honestly. See the question on rebuilding trust.

Sources

Surah al-Baqarah 2:286Surah an-Nisa' 4:19Surah ar-Rum 30:21

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This answer is general reference, not a fatwa. For your situation, consult the religious affairs office, a Syarie lawyer or your state Syariah Court.

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