How do I know when a marital problem needs professional help and cannot just be solved on our own?

When the same problem keeps recurring without resolution, or starts affecting sleep, work and the children, that is a sign help is needed. Other signs include conversations that always turn into arguments, a lasting sense of distance, or both of you having stopped trying. Asking for help at this stage is not a sign of weakness; it is wiser than waiting until things are too serious. First try talking calmly and honestly; if you reach a dead end after a sincere effort, then get a counsellor. Do not wait until one of you has completely lost hope. The earlier the help, the easier the recovery. See marriage check-up.