🧒 Raising children (tarbiyah) · #191

Can I encourage my eldest child to guide his younger siblings in the other home?

Yes, and it is one of the best ways to bring the two homes closer when done sincerely, not as a burden. An older child can be an example in studies, prayer and character to the younger siblings in the other home. Start with small things, such as helping a younger sibling finish schoolwork or inviting him to play. Make sure you do not turn this into a heavy duty that makes him feel he is losing his childhood. Praise his effort so that he feels appreciated, not used. Guidance between siblings plants a sense of responsibility and love that lasts into adulthood. Avoid comparing their performance during this process. See children & polygyny.

← PreviousMy young child is confused about whether my co-wife's children are his cousins or his siblings. How do I explain?Next →The children in my home look down on their siblings in the other home because their circumstances differ. What should I do?

Related questions

I realise I spoil the children in one home more than the other. How do I stop?Admitting that tendency is the first step; next, correct it deliberately and consistently. The Prophet ﷺ said: “B…My teenager refuses to set foot in my other wife's home. What should I do?Do not force him to go; force only hardens his heart and pushes him away from you. In the teenage years, a child need…The children in my home look down on their siblings in the other home because their circumstances differ. What should I do?That attitude of looking down must be corrected promptly because it contradicts family values and humility. C…The children are confused because the rules at my home and at their mother's home are very different. What should I do?Accept that two homes will not be the same, and focus on keeping your own home’s rules consistently. Children can l…I found out my child is being contacted by a stranger online. What should I do?Take this seriously at once, because online predators often lure children by seeming friendly first. If your…I am a single father and my daughter is entering her teens. How do I guide her in matters I understand less?A teenage daughter needs knowledge, trust, and a trusted woman for the matters you find hard to explain. Build an open relation…

This answer is general reference, not a fatwa. For your situation, consult the religious affairs office, a Syarie lawyer or your state Syariah Court.

Comments or feedback

Read only by the MYPolygyny administrator — never published.

About Us · Ask · Site Map · Privacy · Editorial policy · Disclaimer