🕊️ Conflict & resolution · #66
We are thinking of living apart for a while to calm down. Is this allowed, and what are the consequences?
It is allowed if both agree and the aim is repair, not leaving the wife suspended without certainty; set the length, maintenance and means of contact clearly.
Allah forbids leaving a wife suspended, neither treated as a wife nor divorced (an-Nisa' 4:129), and tells us to appoint arbiters when a breakdown is feared (an-Nisa' 4:35). While living apart, the marriage continues and maintenance for the wife and children remains obligatory if she leaves with her husband's agreement. Things to agree: the length (for example a few weeks), who looks after the children, a visiting schedule, maintenance, and when you will see a counsellor. Separation without a plan often ends in divorce or a neglected wife. Also avoid starting new relationships or exposing the problems publicly during this time. See Counselling.
Allah forbids leaving a wife suspended, neither treated as a wife nor divorced (an-Nisa' 4:129), and tells us to appoint arbiters when a breakdown is feared (an-Nisa' 4:35). While living apart, the marriage continues and maintenance for the wife and children remains obligatory if she leaves with her husband's agreement. Things to agree: the length (for example a few weeks), who looks after the children, a visiting schedule, maintenance, and when you will see a counsellor. Separation without a plan often ends in divorce or a neglected wife. Also avoid starting new relationships or exposing the problems publicly during this time. See Counselling.
Sources
Surah an-Nisa' 4:129Surah an-Nisa' 4:35Surah at-Talaq 65:7